There have been many days, - many, many - when I have been very proud of the job I have done at being a parent. Today was not one of them. I don't know what happened, but I became so angry. I couldn't seem rid of it either. I came uncorked at the kids - I yelled when I should not have, I spanked the tar out of Nate when a much simpler discipline should have been fine, I made it so that everyone walked on egg-shells around me for much of the day, I sat out of a teaching engagement I had scheduled (I just could not be around people. Heather went in my place.), and I said some choice words I am going to really regret having "taught" Nate later on in life.
I have no idea what is wrong with me. I have been sick for several days and trying to get over it, I am under some financial stress, I am frustrated with some things, etc, etc - but I still don't know why I am sooooo angry. It is like suddenly I am chemically imbalanced or something. I suppose that spiritual attack could play strongly into this too. I just can't seem to stop it.
I think it is just time to go to bed. I sure hope tomorrow is a better day. I basically just hate just about everyone, including myself, right now. VERY not normal for me. Not loving life.
Good night all. Hope you had a better day than I.
God bless you, and keep you from ever going through this -
Paz
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